Tuesday, 13 November 2007
♥ rush. busy. sian
i have this sudden urge to cry. Its like I finally think that i am working quite hard for some things in my life and then i start to realise that what i have done is not enough to make an impact. I duno why am i working so hard for when some ppl can just say something/do something to make me feel demoralised again..
maybe i am too stubborn and just wan ppl to do things my way? I am a piece of worthless crap.
CNY + PROM + ECACO are killing me if anyone doesn't understand. Talk abt CNY, it seems that i must have the eyes to see what happens in future and decide on things immediately. I DUNO WADS WRONG BUT I JUST CAN'T DECIDE. i am very worried that i screw things up with my stupid decisions. i kinda forced my team to work efficiently when me myself can't work at the same rate. I AM TOO STUPID AND INEFFICIENT.
about prom, i am getting really scared that things might just screw up.
ECACO haiz, a job without passion is really driving me nuts. I SHUD JUST SCREW MYSELF AND DIE. *STABS HARD*
I SUCK. haiz. i feel really tired and i really wanna give up everything that i commit to. it is not even half-way thru. There are lotsa of things ahead which i tink i wud have burnt out and just kill myself because i can't cope this kinda of life. I AM NOT A SMART ASS if anyone realised. I DSA-ed. i am not a 6 pointer but a 9 pointer. with only 3A1s on my o lvl cert. I jus feel zibei to see that i study as much as some of the ppl did, but my scores are just lousier. i can't get any shit concepts right, i can't study right, i CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT FOR GOODNESS SAKE.
I AM A BIG SUCKER. :( how i wish i can trash everything out somehow. it is really hard to trash everything out. all the troubles/problems/disappointment just keep revolving in the back of my mind. THEY JUST WUN DISAPPEAR.
Nvm. can't even express myself properly and i expect ppl to understand me? just go eat shit. Just go and pretend to be happy for all you wan, stupid freak. You shud just die coz no one cares. f off.
maybe i am too stubborn and just wan ppl to do things my way? I am a piece of worthless crap.
CNY + PROM + ECACO are killing me if anyone doesn't understand. Talk abt CNY, it seems that i must have the eyes to see what happens in future and decide on things immediately. I DUNO WADS WRONG BUT I JUST CAN'T DECIDE. i am very worried that i screw things up with my stupid decisions. i kinda forced my team to work efficiently when me myself can't work at the same rate. I AM TOO STUPID AND INEFFICIENT.
about prom, i am getting really scared that things might just screw up.
ECACO haiz, a job without passion is really driving me nuts. I SHUD JUST SCREW MYSELF AND DIE. *STABS HARD*
I SUCK. haiz. i feel really tired and i really wanna give up everything that i commit to. it is not even half-way thru. There are lotsa of things ahead which i tink i wud have burnt out and just kill myself because i can't cope this kinda of life. I AM NOT A SMART ASS if anyone realised. I DSA-ed. i am not a 6 pointer but a 9 pointer. with only 3A1s on my o lvl cert. I jus feel zibei to see that i study as much as some of the ppl did, but my scores are just lousier. i can't get any shit concepts right, i can't study right, i CAN'T DO ANYTHING RIGHT FOR GOODNESS SAKE.
I AM A BIG SUCKER. :( how i wish i can trash everything out somehow. it is really hard to trash everything out. all the troubles/problems/disappointment just keep revolving in the back of my mind. THEY JUST WUN DISAPPEAR.
Nvm. can't even express myself properly and i expect ppl to understand me? just go eat shit. Just go and pretend to be happy for all you wan, stupid freak. You shud just die coz no one cares. f off.
23:34
