Saturday, 2 October 2010
♥ goodbye
Lotsa projects, presentations and assignments to be done. I am getting quite restless and sian with all the stuff that's happening around me.
This is probably the most angst week that I ever had in my NUS days. Alot of things that I am unhappy with which isn't exactly anyone's fault. Severely lack of sleep is first, then came ideas which clash with different people. Next, I was feeling a little imbalance because the people around me make me feel that I am a big trouble and a source of irritation. In addition, I feel that I need to finish alot of things but I am like doing alot more than the rest. Maybe it is just my illusion, perhaps I am still in my angst mode but I truly feel extremely unhappy about it, and its like suffocating me silently. I can't express this openly because I can't justify anything at all, its all in my gut feeling which may be inaccurate and I don't want to point finger at anyone because it could be just me.
Everyone seems to have alot of time for other things but I am like suffering from many opportunity cost that bring me to the situation that i am in now. I freaking can't slp alot because i need to complete my work and it is still undone. When i really slp, i can't finish my work still and what's worse, it accumulates. I freaking hate myself for working so slowly. Maybe it is the way I work. I somehow just want to make sure that I have done enough to make sure I understood everything otherwise I can't get started on anything. Good and bad, but I am so freaking stressed nowadays. :( My tears can come out any time seriously.
1. DTM slides and compilation
2. Law assignment essay paragraph + case study analysis
3. Peer lecture - slides and how to present
4. Letter to authority - asking for interview/dig confidential info.. whatever totally untouched.
5. Cheerleading website and performance liaising
6. Construction technology project - analysis + model + site visit + focus.. STAGNATED
Seriously.. I know I am lumping everything together, there are different deadlines for all the above stuff. But I just can't help feeling alittle succumb to the workload. Cheerleading training is starting next week. I really need to finish all the stuff by this weekend, like at least 90%. Work hard Wei Ting, even if you are like so depressed and don't know how to manage it. You need to just continue pushing yourself and break yourself to emerge stronger yah. Cry now because you know that after that, you gotta pick yourself up and rush everything to the end without a break, without any complain. You probably have gone through this a thousand times, just grit your teeth, even if it makes you bleed...
The bank has finally come knocking at my house door and pasted stuff. My house will be so empty the next time i come home, which would be quite awhile after this weekend because I am gonna mug damn hard in school already.
really want to tell everyone to go and die. I am fucked up. Die bitch.
This is probably the most angst week that I ever had in my NUS days. Alot of things that I am unhappy with which isn't exactly anyone's fault. Severely lack of sleep is first, then came ideas which clash with different people. Next, I was feeling a little imbalance because the people around me make me feel that I am a big trouble and a source of irritation. In addition, I feel that I need to finish alot of things but I am like doing alot more than the rest. Maybe it is just my illusion, perhaps I am still in my angst mode but I truly feel extremely unhappy about it, and its like suffocating me silently. I can't express this openly because I can't justify anything at all, its all in my gut feeling which may be inaccurate and I don't want to point finger at anyone because it could be just me.
Everyone seems to have alot of time for other things but I am like suffering from many opportunity cost that bring me to the situation that i am in now. I freaking can't slp alot because i need to complete my work and it is still undone. When i really slp, i can't finish my work still and what's worse, it accumulates. I freaking hate myself for working so slowly. Maybe it is the way I work. I somehow just want to make sure that I have done enough to make sure I understood everything otherwise I can't get started on anything. Good and bad, but I am so freaking stressed nowadays. :( My tears can come out any time seriously.
1. DTM slides and compilation
2. Law assignment essay paragraph + case study analysis
3. Peer lecture - slides and how to present
4. Letter to authority - asking for interview/dig confidential info.. whatever totally untouched.
5. Cheerleading website and performance liaising
6. Construction technology project - analysis + model + site visit + focus.. STAGNATED
Seriously.. I know I am lumping everything together, there are different deadlines for all the above stuff. But I just can't help feeling alittle succumb to the workload. Cheerleading training is starting next week. I really need to finish all the stuff by this weekend, like at least 90%. Work hard Wei Ting, even if you are like so depressed and don't know how to manage it. You need to just continue pushing yourself and break yourself to emerge stronger yah. Cry now because you know that after that, you gotta pick yourself up and rush everything to the end without a break, without any complain. You probably have gone through this a thousand times, just grit your teeth, even if it makes you bleed...
The bank has finally come knocking at my house door and pasted stuff. My house will be so empty the next time i come home, which would be quite awhile after this weekend because I am gonna mug damn hard in school already.
really want to tell everyone to go and die. I am fucked up. Die bitch.
00:34
